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the call to come home by victoria larkins

by victoria larkins |

A narrative, contemplative piece sharing my experience within the arrival of this collective virus ⌇by sankalpa founder @victoria__larkins


Nature is always organizing to restore balance. For some time now we have been on one side of the spectrum. Oriented outside ourselves, rushing, racing, distracted by stimuli that keeps us in a cycle of needing more. And here we are pausing with ourselves, slowing down, showing up for those in need, remembering community, remembering what we value most.

I’m not saying it isn’t tragic that so many lives are at risk and fading from us right now. It is tragic. Loss is scary. The unknown is real. I observe the collective argument right now: vaccine vs no vaccine, push back the stay at home orders vs open it up again, take social distancing seriously vs it’s all a scam. Okay. There is relevance to contemplating and conversing with one another around all these areas. Yet what about zooming way far out? Let’s try for a moment to step back, and widen the scope of our awareness. Nature is always organizing to restore balance. So what about what nature is saying right now?



Pause is here. Solitude is prevalent. As we inhabit our homes, and explore the close corners of our relationships with those we live with or with ourselves, we are seeing things in a new light. Birds are chirping, the air is clearer than ever before. Laugher lingers in the backyards of families connecting all together again.

What if the medicine has already arrived? What if this pause is all we need to restore balance? If we look at the mechanics of a virus, it is to restore balance between our internal environment and external environment. Viruses run through plants and animals all of the time. They don’t resist it, so it moves freely. The result is co-existence.

Ancient traditions have long valued our body’s innate healing capacity. They all speak a similar language—these holistic practices do. They say energy flows where our attention goes. We create wellness, or we destroy it. In one way or another, these holistic approaches simply give attention to areas often untouched within our body, mind, and energy. Simply by inhabiting reservoirs within ourselves, we awaken, heal, and restore flow. Rather than killing the symptom, suppressing our immune system as a side effect, we empower our body to heal at the root of where the dis-ease began. All through rest, attention, and trusting in ourselves, we arrive at the source of our resistance. And then we have a choice. Holistic medicine gives our bodies and our minds a choice.


I got sick during this quarantine. And I did go into fear. I did enter into the collective panic that I could in fact die. And then, I logged off social media. I took chinese herbs to strengthen my lungs and mobilize whatever exogenous presence was in my body, such as a virus, to flow out of my system. I meditated, a lot. I did gentle yoga. I walked in nature. I napped in the sun. I ate healthy foods. And I consciously chose to direct my attention to trusting my body’s capacity. I decided to listen to her, rather than suppress.

And ultimately here is what it came down to: I had to let go of the ideas I had picked up that I need something outside myself to be okay. Medicine, money, relationships, a plan. And in this last layer, I cried and cried. For it was a blessing. Every tear I shed, I released the notion that I had something to fear within myself. And I arrived more and more in the experience of the vitality within me. It was an initiation, really. A pilgrimage back home. Funny, we have all been asked to stay at home.

But let’s wonder for a moment, by who? Who is asking us to be home right now? And what does home really mean to you? Could it be nature? Could it be your true nature, calling you to come back to yourself?

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